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Rejection Letter
Mar. 16th, 2011 03:16 pmDear Market,
I know it was I who initially approached you, trying to catch your fancy with my (deeply sexy) space-pirate story, and I fully understood when you told me that it just wasn't the kind of thing that turns you on. Honestly it was a spur-of-the-moment thing on my part, a whim and perhaps a mistake at that, but certainly nothing I have, or ever had, any serious emotional intent about. I can guess how it must be, always having all sorts of random writers constantly throwing themselves at you, making your head spin, and some perhaps less well able to take the hint and let go.
To be candid, I've been rejected before, sometimes more kindly, sometimes much less so. Not that I get rejected all the time, mind you -- oooh, the stories I could tell! But my affairs with other markets are my own to fondly dwell on, and of no concern to this matter I hope to address.
It's this "automated" rejection thing of yours. I know you're proud of it, like to show it off to all the writers once you've got a few beers in you and the social inhibitions fall away. Surely something automated, while lacking a personal touch, must be a necessity for a market of your broad appeal, and I bear you no ill-will for it. Our brief, questionable, and ultimately unsuccessful flirtation is not something I wish to revisit; I've entirely moved on.
Have you?
You see, you've sent me the exact same automated rejection, for the same story, every two weeks for several months now. I get that you have no love for me or my story, and it does not trouble me. I've already started seeing other markets, and I think it would be for the best if you thought about moving on as well. There are plenty of other writers in the sea, and surely one out there will catch your eye the way I did not. I truly hope for the best for you.
In the meantime, I hope you will understand that I mean no personal insult when I say please stop emailing me.
Yours,
Writer
I know it was I who initially approached you, trying to catch your fancy with my (deeply sexy) space-pirate story, and I fully understood when you told me that it just wasn't the kind of thing that turns you on. Honestly it was a spur-of-the-moment thing on my part, a whim and perhaps a mistake at that, but certainly nothing I have, or ever had, any serious emotional intent about. I can guess how it must be, always having all sorts of random writers constantly throwing themselves at you, making your head spin, and some perhaps less well able to take the hint and let go.
To be candid, I've been rejected before, sometimes more kindly, sometimes much less so. Not that I get rejected all the time, mind you -- oooh, the stories I could tell! But my affairs with other markets are my own to fondly dwell on, and of no concern to this matter I hope to address.
It's this "automated" rejection thing of yours. I know you're proud of it, like to show it off to all the writers once you've got a few beers in you and the social inhibitions fall away. Surely something automated, while lacking a personal touch, must be a necessity for a market of your broad appeal, and I bear you no ill-will for it. Our brief, questionable, and ultimately unsuccessful flirtation is not something I wish to revisit; I've entirely moved on.
Have you?
You see, you've sent me the exact same automated rejection, for the same story, every two weeks for several months now. I get that you have no love for me or my story, and it does not trouble me. I've already started seeing other markets, and I think it would be for the best if you thought about moving on as well. There are plenty of other writers in the sea, and surely one out there will catch your eye the way I did not. I truly hope for the best for you.
In the meantime, I hope you will understand that I mean no personal insult when I say please stop emailing me.
Yours,
Writer
